90% Of The Time

This is a really great poem from my relative Zach Thomas in North Carolina…who is recovering from a broken wrist from the dog attack mentioned in the poem.

Pretty easy to substitute “diversification”, “stocks go up”, or many of the countless other market truths that apply (most of the time).

Ninety Percent of the Time

A growling Rottweiler attacked me, suddenly, one day.
After it broke my arm, I heard a woman say,
“We have a dog just like that. He seems so gentle, kind.
He’s wonderful with children, ninety percent of the time.”

Goliath shook the ground he trod, could conquer foes by fear.
David’s Mom said, “Son, be bold.  Take this slingshot here.
Protect us from the giant troll!  I know you’ll do just fine.
Those thingies work all right, I’m told, ninety percent of the time.”

Jane entertained second thoughts about her Tarzan man
The day she started sinking in a liquid pool of sand.
“Grab my hand,” yodeled Tarzan, swinging on a vine.
“These jungle ropes are good to go, ninety percent of the time.”

Remember the old lady, who lived in a shoe?
Her husband was the one in charge.  He knew what to do.
His words of reassurance calmed when she was bad to whine:
“I say rhythm serves us well, ninety percent of the time.”

The C.I.A., the S.E.C, and banks’ investment schemes,
Health insurance, Hoover dams and heavy submarines —
They’re trusted institutions, proven worthy over time
And unquestionably reliable, ninety percent of the time.


Zach Thomas 12/2009